A reader writes: not a slow path to atheism

A reader writes:

Thanks for inspiring us in your books, blog, and guidance; encouraging the will to continue in faithful even if uncharted Christian territory.
I felt compelled to comment but have found it difficult to say what I wanted regarding the post at Rachel’s blog on “progressive Christianity being a slow path to atheism “. I see why your response was so long. Here goes mine.
I found myself, quite unexpectedly, falling off that cliff a few years back. Ironically, I had just started reading Naked Spirituality. Difficult because it was a dark, painful time, even if fairly brief, and hard to revisit without angst. But, I want to offer encouragement for those walking that path.
What I learned:

Rhetoric, logic, philosophy, theology, evangelicalism, and atheism not longer make any sense to me from a traditional standpoint (even though I participate in a relatively conservative faith community weekly and find joy in it,).
Do not try climb back up the metaphorical cliff- I just surrendered to the process.
As the panic subsided, I realized that I still went to sleep with God every night.
At the end of what I thought, at the exhaustion of what I knew, past the edge of what I believed here is always the “something”, always a sense of “something’, presence close as my breath; “something” just beyond me.
I love “it “ and I know I love “it”.
I no longer claim to understanding God. “God” does not seem to be the right word any longer – it is not personal enough.
I like theory and theology as hobbies but its pursuit is now always hollow in the end.
The old speculation about how it all works whether it pertains to the Bible and Christianity (or some other religion) and the other faith of science and secular humanism is just tired and inadequate.
I favor peace over clarity and am fine with that.
I accept life in paradox- the less I know the more insight comes (and then goes); the less sure I am of what I believe the more I believe and I am OK with what I believe (at that moment); the less I see the Bible as “a constitution” the more I respect its counsel and truth.
Without rules or preconceptions, the ancient ways of faith seem to ring more authentic to me.
Now I see how most religions as they are practiced as idolatry but not the “something” behind it.
As in Naked Spirituality, I am “ behold”ing. With my evangelical friends and family I use a different language to say the same thing- God is real for me and I do not seek to control it.
But, Jesus is real to me, too (I’m just saying’.) and crucial for a host reasons not necessary for this discourse.
The Mystery is real and it is good and I am bound to it.

I hope this will help when typical rhetoric does not.
Blessings & prayers to you, your family and to those who listen to you.
Thanks again.

Thank you for writing. Helpful and well-put descriptions – resonant with what I call “Stage 4” in Naked Spirituality.
A frivolous aside – I love it that Rachel Held Evans can now be identified by first name only. Rachel – you’re kind of like Beyonce, Bono, Sting, and Cher!